Yo who tf starts a bog like this?
There's something about being a little too unkind to a year. When you're seeing it off, or perhaps seeing it away, there is this unexampled confluence of certainty that you'll remember it, coupled with the crushing uncertainty that you might not be the same person when you look back.
It'll all be irrevocably etched in the pages of the past; a character and a world you once had the fortuity to live as, and through.
bro thinks he aristotle or sumshit
The "Thing"
I've figured that if an event divides your timeline into "Before It," "During It," and "After It," the sheer frequency with which you think about "It" acts as a litmus test for damage.[1]I am aware this is barely a scientific metric, but bear with me.
main character syndrome?
It was the year for turnarounds; where the merry-go-round isn't all that merry. It was a year where I’d make a grave mistake that graves a part of me that may or may not make it to the sequel.
grey's anatomy's writer called
The Emergency Room
My friend "Hope", who's usually so poppy and annoying, got into an accident. She’s currently in the metaphysical emergency room, thriving on life support. She lays on the white bed; the fence between life and death.
Patient attempted to touch grass but encountered a runtime error. Currently oscillating between "It's so over" and "We're so back."
math....in THIS economy?!
The Equation
If I had to sum it up: "When it comes to 2023, college life (or lack thereof) has added to it, just as much my mental health (or lack thereof) seems to have taken away."
yapping level: expert
It's this riveting tug between the two... It's almost as if they're at inversely corresponding degrees; the loudness is cancelled out by the conspicuous and coequal quiet.
But isn't that all too convoluted? I could simply say that it's been wonderful and inarticulably gratifying to have had the ticket to live through this month.[2]Gratitude practice is my new personality.
don't cringe don't cringe
"And more than that, the fortuity of having had this inimitably special girl who’s embellished my experience and added so much life to my days here."
I hope you know that you're really and truly valued here.(we ball)
titanic references pending...
The Solo Boat Trip
So, 2023 eh? I'd be lying if I said I haven't been trying to conjure up a bevy of words that would perfectly render a distilled mental impression of what this year has been. It's a recurring pattern now.
algorithm of failure
- 01.I actively try to "come up" with words.
- 02.I conveniently fail.
- 03.I tell the truth whilst trying not to sugarcoat anything.
- 04.I virtually succeed.
I just happen to buy myself tickets to this solo boat trip, and find myself stranded in the middle of an ocean of words; completely unbeknownst to when or how I'm gonna wash up on a shore. And then I start swimming.
feelings flowing like a river
On Warmth and Embers
If 2022 was about finding warmth, 2023 is about learning to let go of that warmth in more abstract ways than physical or (senti)mental.
I guess, a lot of what warmth means to me has to do with the elements of familiarity... with places, corners, and sights that one develops memories of all kinds.
You're always a sigh, or a blink of an eye away from inducing a nostalgia attack.[3]Side effects include gazing out windows and listening to sad indie music.
It's never not bittersweet.(It is what it is)